Heaven on earth

A poem

My mother calls to ask me
If I still believe in God
And I say yes
Of course
How could I not
She’s in my bed
Speaking scripture
And I’m writing it down as fast as I can
And I’m telling her all my sins
And she’s forgiven me
And she’s giving me penance
You must love me more
And I say, okay, if I must

My mother asks me if I still go to church
And I say yes
Of course
Every Sunday morning
My communion is in the top drawer of my dresser in a plastic baggie
I pinch off a piece in between my fingers and say a prayer
I know you are powerful
Thank you for coming to me
I chew with my eyes closed
Swallow
The spirit flows into my veins
The doors of my mind open
And I go out to preach the word

I sit down in the cafe
And calmly and quietly
Bring myself to the brink of madness
So that I can eke out a few holy words

When I can’t stand to just sit there anymore
I walk the streets and grab strangers by the shoulders
Look deep into their eyes
Don’t you believe?!
Don’t you see?!

My mother is satisfied
That’s nice, honey
I’m glad we raised you right
And she tells her church group that her son is going to heaven

Mom, I’m already there