I desire to feel good
I'm reading the book Ask and It Is Given. One of the ideas is that you can attain something you desire by imagining you already have it and "flow[ing] your thoughts toward the enjoyment of the experience" (26).
So I tried it.
I closed my eyes and imagined my investment account having $1 million in it. I imagined the user interface of my online brokerage account. I imagined the one and the six zeroes. And then I tried to imagine how this would make me feel.
As I was going through this meditation, I turned on the transcription app on my phone, and spoke my thoughts aloud:
So, I'm currently imagining having $1 million in my investment account. And I'm asking myself, "How does it make me feel?" It feels good, I guess. Yeah. I feel a sense of accomplishment and pride, but I guess I still feel excitement to keep going, to invest more. What am I investing that $1 million in? I would want to invest it and grow it even more.
I still don't think I would spend that much. I wouldn't have to work anymore, if I kept my spending under control.
So what do I really desire? I think I desire love. That's why I work so much and want to make money—because I want the validation and love that I think would come to me if people think I have a lot of money or they respect my work or admire my art.
So what do I really desire? I desire to feel good. I desire to be happy and peaceful.
During this meditation, I realized that, in some cases, what I think I desire is actually just an intermediary that I think will get me to my true, deeper desire.
If I just focus directly on my deeper desire, I can cut out the middle man.
In this case, I've realized that my deeper desire is to feel good.
Now, instead of pursuing this convoluted causal chain of intermediary steps whereby I must first make a certain amount of money to then earn love and respect to then finally feel good, why don't I just directly pursue what makes me feel good?