Chapter 1. The fan, a.k.a, mmmmmmmm-yu
The first sound I hear comes from the fan. It is mostly a low, monotonous drone. But then there are subtle groans for brief moments when the fan seems to be exerting more effort. These moments come every three or four seconds and last about a half-second.
Mmmmmmmm-yu. Mmmmmmmm-yu. Mmmmmmmm—this is the continuous drone. Yu—this is the extra-exertional groan. The groan sounds like a car’s engine—softer, far away; then louder, coming closer. Except the car is not driving on a road perpendicular to my ear. Instead, the road is in a circle that loops out away from my ear and then back around. It is when the car comes back around and passes that I hear the groan.
Chapter 2. The sound of silence, a.k.a, eeeeeeee
Other than the fan, there is the sound of silence. It is like the static, salt-and-pepper channel on a television, turned down to the lowest volume. Or, like a million bugs in the trees at night. Not big and loud cicadas. More like little flies, whispering softly. And so many of them. Ssssssss. But the ‘s’ sounds too much like a snake. Silence doesn’t stick out its tongue or slither, so the ‘s’ can’t be right.
The sound is continuous. There is no inbreath, no interruption like the groan of the fan. Just a constant, slightly high-pitched exhale. Because of the continuity, I assume the onomatopoeia for silence should have only one letter. I say the alphabet in my head, trying out different letters, mouthing the sound aloud to hear if it matches the silence, like a singer trying to match the note being played on a piano.
Tttttttt. Yes, maybe ‘t’ is closer. Actually, more like this: teeeeeee. But there can only be one letter. So maybe just ‘e’ then. Eeeeeeee. It’s a “long” ‘e,’ like in the word ‘be.’ Eeeeeeee. Yes, that is my best guess, for now.
Lately, I have been making an effort to write more about what I am sensing and less about what I am thinking. I am making this effort, in part, just to get out of my own head, but also in an attempt to hone my ability to write sensory experiences.
I have come up with a simple exercise. At any moment, I might ask myself one of these questions and then write my answer in a few sentences:
What am I seeing?
What am I hearing?
What am I feeling?
What am I smelling?
What am I tasting?
Having awoken to this exact situation numerous times, just YES. This sensory exercise is *definitely* working!
Plus, something like this should honestly help with more than writing. I've been trying to be more mindful of what's going on in the moment, basically by practicing this exercise, so thanks for combining writing with that goal in my inbox this morning! It's always nice to open up my email and see that you've posted :)